It's almost a new day and a new year. Personally 2020 and 2021 all kinda blurred together from the virtual to in-person school and work, a new grandson and grandpup, marriage, personal and executive coaching, publishing my 2nd book, two kids having surgery, a promotion, being investigated by HR, COVID-19 diagnosis, and the list goes on and on! But thank goodness we are about to get a whopping 12 new chapters (months) and 365 new chances (days) to allow God to pen the stories of our lives! I'm excited!
Roughly four years ago, I decided at the start of each year I would focus on just one word or phrase as my New Year resolution. I never really had any luck with my long list of resolutions and thought this would be a way to get an easy win and feel better about myself. My first word was "Light". I chose the scripture, "Let your light so shine before men, that they see your good works, and glorify your Father in heaven." I posted this word and scripture on my door and desk at work. In June of that year, I accepted a new role at a new job, and when I tell you it was a dark place and culture. Yoooo! It's what I imagine hell to be like. God needed light in that place so my word/phrase was really timely for the advancement of God's kingdom. So my word, my God-given word led me closer to purpose. It wasn't pleasant but I know it's been for a purpose. After "light" I've been kinda scared to choose a word. Cause the last 2 years have been something that required me to align my heart to my words. It’s been a challenge!
But this year I was lying in bed, super still after reading about Josiah in the book of 2nd Chronicles, and I began to pray. Initially, I wanted to pray for provisions/money. You see my sons' car needs an engine and is going to costs $2k and we need over $6k to pay my daughter's tuition in January and the foundation of our home shifted again due to an underground slab leak. So the physical Rose wanted to ask for money, increase, more. But the spirit quickly quieted that urge. It brought to my remembrance I have no lack in provisions, (your girl is paid quite well actually), I lack priorities. The Advocate suggested I pray for peace.
The phrase that came to me was peace over profits. I am tired, worn, heavy. I know it might not look like it from the outside but my inside spiritual Rose is a busybody. I jump from one project to the next ten thousand, never able to be content, rarely feeling fulfilled or accomplished. My heart is broken for my children as I watch them grow in their faith through their own challenges. I remain at my workplace not because I believe it is a part of my assignment but because I have my child's tuition and volleyball fees to pay. I watch my husband go to a 2nd job every night and don't get to feel his warm embrace partly because of my own stubbornness with finances. 2022, no scrap that, today, I just want peace. I want to know I am in the will of God. I want to believe who I am in Christ. I want Him more than I want anything. I’m like Moses, I am boldly requesting to see God’s face because his blessings equate to nothing without His presence.
I am not expecting 2022 to be absent of conflict. No, I expect it to be just the opposite. I expect it to be full of conflict but free of worry and full of peace. I expect the enemy to try and take me out mentally, physically, and spiritually. AND I FULLY EXPECT the power & peace of God to keep me steady, strong, and silent throughout the year. Cheers to PEACE for the Twenty & Two Two. Your girl is growing in my fruit of the spirit. How about you?! I love you. God loves you more!
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